THE DIRTY LEGAL SECRET

June 16, 2011 by Leave a Comment

One of the dirty little secrets of the United States legal system is the prevalence of sexual abuse and assault against Native American women. They are sexually assaulted two and one half times as often as any other group in America and they are also the most likely to be stalked.

Native women are more likely to be assaulted by men of another race; to sustain injuries during the assault; and to be gang raped.

Native American WomenImage courtesy of http://oursisterskeeper.org

Because of long-standing cultural mistrust of law enforcement and the judicial systems, these victims are often hesitant to report the crime.

Even when victims report a rape to tribal police, there is often no response. Most reservations have small federal funded BIA (Bureau of Indian Affairs) Police forces and sexual assaults are not even investigated. Many of the Indian Health Service Centers –the first medical stop for most Native Americans- do not stock rape kits, so DNA evidence, vital for legal prosecution, is not collected.

The U.S. Department of Justice has recently acknowledged this problem with pilot projects for tribes to change the social and judicial climate around sexual assault. Grants now fund classes for law enforcement officers, encouraging tribes to change their legal codes to increase punishment for rapes, and to treat victims of domestic violence with sensitivity.

Tribal women themselves have started to band together to assist victims of assault and to demand action from law enforcement and the legal system. These women honor the survivors of sexual assault, sponsor educational programs, and lobby their tribes for changes in their legal codes to take sexual crimes seriously.

Filed Under: Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: , ,

Rape And Sexual Abuse – Talk About It To Enable Victims To Speak Out

November 27, 2010 by Leave a Comment

Our attitude towards rape and sexual abuse indicates the flaws in the way women are treated in our society. For starters, people think of females as the victim the moment of somebody mentions rape or sexual abuse. There is no doubt that majority of the rape victims are women. However, there is also no denying that majority of the rape cases never get reported. In such a scenario, possibility of a large number of men and boys being raped and the cases going unreported cannot be denied.

Most of us presume that are such instances cannot happen in our family. We visualize rapes as acts perpetrated by strangers on female family member. The truth is that majority of the rapes are done by those individuals who were known to the victim. Secondly, the crime may not be restricted to females only. Even young male individuals are equally susceptible to sexual abuse.

This may not be a very appealing task but it is essential to talk about these things in the family. Each and every family member must be encouraged to be open about such matters. The last thing you want is for your family member to conclude that support may be absent due to the closed attitude towards rape or sexual abuse.

Many persons react with shock and disbelief when they discover that their family member suffered the trauma but did not trust them enough to be open about it. One cannot expect a victim of rape or sexual abuse to be completely logical and sensible about future actions. Rather, the onus is upon the family to hammer the message that it can be relied upon for support no matter what happens.

Such an approach may also lead to discussions about things that otherwise would not take place. Such transparency may help youngsters follow precautions that may reduce risk of mistakes that may lead to instances of sexual abuse.

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Filed Under: Rehab, Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: , ,

It Is Every Parent’s Duty To Educate Child About Sexual Health

November 25, 2010 by Leave a Comment

Responsible parents who he spend a lot of time and effort and teaching the importance of good health to their kids clam up when it comes to sexual health. Kids are very quick to realize that the parent is not comfortable talking about sexual health. This leads to a piquant situation where the person that the kid can trust the most becomes silent on such an important topic.

In such a scenario, the kid uses alternative source of information about sexual health. Needless to say, it often leads to complications when they choose the wrong person for help.

Every responsible parent has two options. Either you should not bother about the child or you should be prepared to fulfill all your responsibilities. Teaching your child about various facets and aspects of sexual health is your duty. You are one person who has the welfare of the child as top most priority. You will not break the trust that the child has. In such a scenario, encouraging your child to rely upon nameless and faceless so called experts found online or friends does not make sense.

There is a tendency to provide sexual health education to females and to leave males free to find information from wherever they want. There also a belief that the male child shall find this information from friends or adult content on the internet. Such an approach means that the male child will be encouraged to check inappropriate content on the internet. It is not the right place to know more about sexual education and sexual health.

If you are not comfortable discussing these matters with your kids, you should try to work through a trusted family member. You can even opt for counseling to find the right way to discuss these issues. Do not leave your child to take care of these issues on their own. That is only going to lead to unwanted complications.

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Filed Under: Rehab, Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: , ,

How To Protect Your Young Children From Rape And Sexual Abuse?

November 22, 2010 by Leave a Comment

Is your son or daughter beginning to move around independently without your constant guidance? There comes an age when the child is no longer interested in being accompanied by the parent all the time. If you try to stick around despite this, you will end up being tagged as a conservative parent and will become a source of embarrassment for your child. However, there is no denying that there are too many risks involved in letting the child to move around without any adult supervision.

A trip to the movie in the nearby mall can become a huge security risk if the child is not cautious. It is a big bad world out there and no amount of self denial is going to change it. In such a scenario, it is very important to arrange for safety of the child from threat of rape and sexual abuse.

Do not expect others to agree with your risk assessment. You cannot ask the child to take care of these things. They need more exposure and maturity to understand the implications of such events on their life. Of course, you can set the ground rules and insist that the child should not talk to strangers. However, you cannot simply trust the child to take care of these issues. You have to be proactive until you are satisfied that the child is smart enough to take care of these things.

Take advantage of technology. Combine it with strict discipline. Give a cell phone to your child to ensure constant contact. Establish a curfew time and insist on strict obedience. It is better to err on side of caution to reduce risk of rape and sexual abuse. Remember, these precautions are applicable to your girl ball as well as your body. Do not simply presume that boys are free of risk because they happen to be male.

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Filed Under: Disabilities, Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: , ,

How To Support A Family Member Who Is Victim Of Rape Or Sexual Abuse?

November 19, 2010 by Leave a Comment

How should you support a family member who has suffered from rape or sexual abuse? Well, it is impossible to be mentally prepared for such a horrific event. However, it is important to move on and understand what needs to be done. The person may take a long time to come out of the shock and trauma caused by the event.

It is natural for the individual to feel a sense of a nameless fear and hesitation to place trust after the event. Such a trauma is not going to be forgotten in just a day or two. Needless to say, taking care of such a family member is going to place a lot of strain on family bonding. An understanding and caring approach is necessary to not just help the person but also keep the family together.

It is natural to feel pity and sympathy for the family member affected by the crime. However, such sympathy, if not used constructively, may simply serve as a reminder to the family member of the trauma suffered. It may sound cruel but it is the job of the family members to encourage the individual to move on. Of course, the victim still feeling the pain may not take this suggestion in the right spirit. However, a patient and sensitive approach will send the message across that there is no point in dwelling on the past and that it is necessary to move on.

Do not try to be everything for the affected family member all at once. You cannot be a friend, philosopher, guide, mentor, adviser and also offer a shoulder to cry on at the same time. If you share a close relationship with the victim, it may be very difficult to admit that others may be better placed to help the victim. Your proximity may make the victim uncomfortable in seeking your help. Be there when needed- that is what family members are there for.

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Filed Under: Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: , ,

Helping An Abuse Victim as a Friend or Family Member

November 2, 2010 by Leave a Comment

Do you have a friend, family member, or other loved one who is a victim of abuse? Do you know how to assist that person in the very best way? The support of loved ones can be a determining factor in how quickly a victim of abuse recovers. There are many things you can do to help.

First, listen. Victims need to communicate thoughts and feelings as they recover. This can be a difficult situation for you, but simply letting them explain how they feel or even just letting them vent about what they are feeling can make a huge difference. You can show support for the individual in many other ways, but through listening, you show that you are really there for them and that you truly care.

Help them seek professional help. In addition to your support, victims need sensitive medical counseling or other kinds of professional help.

Watch for signs that the victim might be inappropriately channeling stress. In some cases, victims of abuse may need help from drug and alcohol treatment centers because they’ve turned to substances or alcohol to help them cope with their situation.

You need to realize that there’s a limit to how much you can help. You may experience feelings of anger, frustration, and helplessness. You should suppress the urge to express those feelings to the survivor. This is very important during the times when the victim may be silent, crying or internalizing.

Remember that you may need special care in this situation as you strive to be sensitive to your loved one. These types of situations can be stressful and detrimental to the closest support person. Since you may not be able to express some emotions, you might want to find other friends or even trained professionals in whom you can confide.

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Filed Under: Rehab, Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: , ,

The Truth About Teen Dating Abuse

August 13, 2010 by Leave a Comment
It is a common misconception that teens are exempt from the problems that plague adult relationships, especially domestic abuse. In reality, it has been shown that a third of teenagers have been involved in a dating relationship that has turned violent. Known as teen dating abuse, it is a carbon copy of the usual conception of domestic abuse in which a form of violence is used by one partner to exert power and control on the other.
The truth of teen dating abuse is generally unknown for a variety of reasons. Teens may be peer pressured to stay quiet or due to inexperience, may not understand what exactly is happening. Also, they may have a strong desire to experience love along with exercising freedom from parents.
Teen conceptions of romantic relationships can contribute to dating abuse. Teen males may think that they have authority in the relationship and deserve physical interaction. Male teenagers are also under extreme peer pressure from other males. Young women on the other hand may perceive the abuse as a form of romance and that it is their responsibility to resolve relationship issues.
There are numerous indicators that point to teen dating abuse beyond conventional signs of injury. Difficulties in school such as poor grades or flagging attendance are noticeable signals. Severe emotional shifts and a desire to only be alone are red flags, along with experimentation with alcohol and drugs.
Incidents of abuse from verbal to sexual tend to happen most often in one of the partner’s homes. Out of teen women ages 14 to 17, in one survey, 40 percent said they are acquainted with someone that has been a victim of abuse. In another, 60 percent of women ages 15 to 24 were currently in a relationship in which violence was used.
There are effective precautions for teens to take to avoid violent situations such as double dating and alerting a friend or family of their whereabouts. In times of discomfort teens should excuse themselves quickly. If something does occur, parents or authority figures should be notified immediately.

It is a common misconception that teens are exempt from the problems that plague adult relationships, especially domestic abuse. In reality, it has been shown that a third of teenagers have been involved in a dating relationship that has turned violent. Known as teen dating abuse, it is a carbon copy of the usual conception of domestic abuse in which a form of violence is used by one partner to exert power and control on the other.
The truth of teen dating abuse is generally unknown for a variety of reasons. Teens may be peer pressured to stay quiet or due to inexperience, may not understand what exactly is happening. Also, they may have a strong desire to experience love along with exercising freedom from parents.
Teen conceptions of romantic relationships can contribute to dating abuse. Teen males may think that they have authority in the relationship and deserve physical interaction. Male teenagers are also under extreme peer pressure from other males. Young women on the other hand may perceive the abuse as a form of romance and that it is their responsibility to resolve relationship issues.
There are numerous indicators that point to teen dating abuse beyond conventional signs of injury. Difficulties in school such as poor grades or flagging attendance are noticeable signals. Severe emotional shifts and a desire to only be alone are red flags, along with experimentation with alcohol and drugs.
Incidents of abuse from verbal to sexual tend to happen most often in one of the partner’s homes. Out of teen women ages 14 to 17, in one survey, 40 percent said they are acquainted with someone that has been a victim of abuse. In another, 60 percent of women ages 15 to 24 were currently in a relationship in which violence was used.
There are effective precautions for teens to take to avoid violent situations such as double dating and alerting a friend or family of their whereabouts. In times of discomfort teens should excuse themselves quickly. If something does occur, parents or authority figures should be notified immediately.

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Filed Under: Domestic Abuse, Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: ,

Offering Help and Support to Victims of Sexual Assault

August 12, 2010 by Leave a Comment
Sexual assaults are on the rise. Recent reports indicate that one in five female college graduates was raped at some point during her education. Date rape, gray rape, and a host of other sexual crimes are in the headlines every day. Knowing how to help a friend or family member who has been sexually assaulted is of immense value to the victim.
Immediately After the Attack
Encourage your friend or family member to seek prompt medical attention. Rape is a traumatic event and victims need to know that you care and that you believe they have been victimized. Accompany them to the hospital and stay with them. Encourage them to report the assault. Evidence gathered during an examination will be preserved should a decision be made to press charges.These assaults are most often perpetrated by someone the victim knows, making the situation all the more frightening, confusing, and demeaning. Encourage your friend or family member to seek care from a qualified counselor in the immediate aftermath of the rape. Trained counselors know how to help victims through the difficult first hours after the assault.
Long-term Support Promotes Healing
Many rape victims blame themselves, sometimes even believing that they invited the attack. Avoid asking questions that would reinforce such an incorrect belief. Let them know you believe them. Listen and then listen some more. Victims may want to relive the event over and over as they try to deal with the trauma. Help victims remember to eat and care for themselves. Be patient. The trauma resulting from such an assault takes a very long time to heal. Counselors often suggest keeping a journal of feelings, fears, and thoughts. A journal and pencils or pens can be a thoughtful gift. Take good care of yourself, too. Helping someone you love through such a harrowing experience is draining. It’s important for you to take good care of yourself so that you can be there when you are needed.
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Filed Under: Domestic Abuse, Sex, Sexual Abuse Tagged With: , ,